"Loss" isn't prescriptive. It doesn't tell what to do and how to do it. It's not a self-help recovery guide. It's not a survival kit. It isn't inspirational. It doesn't ask to accept fate or faith. It doesn't advise prayer or meditation. It doesn't invoke the supernatural or suggest a reunion in an afterlife. It isn't academic. It doesn't reach back to classical philosophies or consider present-day thinkers. It doesn't draw on psychological insights. It isn't professorial. So if that's what it isn't, then what is it? I will answer that in a moment but first let me tell you why the distinction is important.When my wife passed away almost seven years ago many well-intentioned friends provided me with magazine articles and books on how to deal with my grief. After perusing these and even more on the Web, I quickly realized that they all missed the mark. I didn't know what I was looking for but I did know it was not in any of those books or articles.With the advantage of hindsight I now know what I wanted. I was looking for someone who would fully understand what I was going through. I wanted nothing more, nothing less. Don't assure me that I will survive the fall. Don't tell me how to swim when I hit the water. Don't tell me that these things happen for a reason and that it's for the better. Back up to where I am right now. I've just been pushed off a cliff, my body is tumbling, my head is spinning and my heart is gushing. Let me know that you know where I am and what I am feeling. Let me know that you know. That's what this book does. It lets the readers know that the writer knows. It does this through expressive writing that connects directly to what the readers feel in their own lives, with their own losses. The readers know quickly and with certainty that this understanding is genuine. It reaches to the same depths as they are experiencing now, in their own lives. Emotions stream from the heart of the writer to the hearts of the readers. They instinctively know that, finally, someone understands. Each one of these short, independent writings expresses thoughts or feelings from a particular moment in my life after or shortly before my wife died. Some are a few pages long and some are a few sentences. Some relate past experiences and some are mind wanderings. Some are analytical and some are even humorous. Most are packed with emotion. The book is loaded with unanswered questions - just like I am - just like most people are.Loss of a loved one is a fact of life. It touches virtually everyone. There are countless others like me who are not comforted by the cacophony of authoritative assurances. What many people need are words of empathy - nothing more, nothing less. That's what this book offers.I hope that those who read this book will temporarily look away from their current grief and see me in a sidecar traveling the same path. They will pause and take a deep breath. After many days and many breaths, maybe they will gaze more often forward and less often downward. When that happens they will already be in the healing process. This is my hope.Joe Goldbacher
I was fat, I was unfit, and I was over 40. At my maximum, I probably weighed around 252 pounds (114 kg), but the truth is I am not really sure. Today, I am close to my ideal weight at just 182 pounds (83kg), fitter than I have probably ever been, regularly play competitive sport, and have completed several extremely demanding physical challenges.
These ideas worked for me - and they can work for you too!
We all know the struggle of trying to lose a few pounds. Our year starts with a resolution to drop three pants sizes, climaxes into the dreaded summer months of bathing suit weather and then resolves once again to feelings of regret and remorse as we enjoy yet another helping of mom's Christmas feast. Although many of us wish that we could go to the gym and enjoy only eating salad, the reality is that our busy lives keep us from pursuing a weight loss regiment for more than a few weeks. And once we start getting the results we want, we end up cheating on the program and binge on a sugary, carb- filled meal. The problem is, there are many issues with dieting programs that you find on the internet or in bookstores. Firstly, these regiments only account for a few weeks or months' worth of meals. This means that after going through the entire meal plan and grocery list three or four times, you are left having to make the same boring recipes again and again in order to keep off the weight you just lost. How many times are you supposed to go through the same cycle before it stops working or you get so tired of the same food that you cheat on your diet? Secondly, most recipes that are included in weight loss programs make serving sizes big enough to feed a family of four. If you are single, why would you make so much food for just one meal? Or perhaps your partner does not want to participate in this new meal plan and you have to struggle to cut down the recipe measurement? And any parent knows that getting your kids to eat is already a nightly struggle, and trying to force them to taste new foods is a whole other battle. This cookbook cuts out the common problems that healthy eaters always come across with other programs by providing a variety of easy, single serving recipes for you to enjoy! This book contains recipes that are proven to help you lose weight, save money on groceries, and continue making progress towards your health and fitness goals. The ingredients this book encourages you to use are fresh and provide you with the necessary proteins, fats, and carbohydrates that will fulfill your daily nutritional requirements. Here is an inescapable fact: everyone wishes that they could lose weight by eating delicious food. While the instructions in this book won't have you carbo- loading on pasta, they will make cooking for yourself easier and much more enjoyable. With over seventy single portion recipes included, the meals in this book are delicious and diverse, so you will always have new flavors to try. You no longer have to sacrifice great flavor to achieve that desired pant size. You can achieve your fitness goals and come to love and nourish your body just by following these recipes. The best part about this weight loss cookbook is that you don't need any fancy kitchen equipment or school taught techniques to make them. With any standard kitchen, you can prepare all of these recipes in less than a half an hour, so you can still satisfy your sweet and savory cravings without worrying about bingeing or cheating during your meals. It's time for you to become an amazing chef with an even more amazing body! In no time at all, you will finally have the physique of your dreams. Without any special tricks, costly supplements, or advice from a top notch professional trainer you will easily burn fat and becoming a healthier, better you. Thank you again for downloading this book. Good luck on your health and wellness journey; enjoy every last bite!
When in 1775 the scholar Wang Xihou compiled a dictionary called Ziguan , he wrote, for illustrative purposes, the personal names of Confucius and the three emperors Kangxi, Yongzheng and Qianlong in the introduction. In oversight, he recorded their complete names. This accidental writing of a few names was condemned by Emperor Qianlong as an unprecedented crime, rebellion and high treason. Wang Xihou was executed, his property confiscated and his books were burnt. His family was arrested and his sons and grandsons were killed or sent as slaves to Heilongjiang. It is surprising what an enormous impact the tabooing of names (bihui ) had on Chinese culture. The names of sovereigns, ancestors, officials, teachers, and even friends were all considered taboo, in other words it was prohibited to pronounce them or to record them in writing. In numerous cases characters identical or similar in writing or pronunciation were often avoided as well. The tabooing of names was observed in the family and on the street, in the office and in the emperor's palace. The practice of bihui had serious consequences for the daily lives of the Chinese and for Chinese historiography. People even avoided certain places and things, and refused to accept offices. They were punished and sometimes even killed in connection with the tabooing of names. The bihui custom existed as an important element of Chinese culture and was perceived as significant by Chinese and foreigners alike. It was crucial for implementing social values and demonstrating the political hierarchy. The present work A Good Son Is Sad if He Hears the Name of His Father is a systematic study of Chinese name-tabooing customs, which until now have been relatively little explored in Western-language Sinological studies. It attempts to provide a long-term perspective on the changing dynamics of tabooing and elucidates various aspects related to the fascinating topic of tabooing of names.
When I decided to write this book it was because I really wanted to share this experience I wanted to provide some insight and comfort to others.
It is a book about the utter devastation that is suicide, it is a journey from day one, the beginning of this process plagued by self doubt, questioning your mental stability, seeking relief, deliverance from intense pain and sorrow, repentance and regret. All these days are relevant to where you are in the present, in my case six years later.
There is hope for those left behind to deal with this life in the absence of the one you love.
The human spirit is truly amazing, your life will go on.... however you will not remain the same.